Tagline

• It's her last best chance...is she going to take it?

Memorable Quotes

Bubba: If I were a woman, I'd be a slut. A lesbian slut. 

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Cheryl: And fuck you very much.

Shopper: What?

Cheryl: Thank you very much.

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Justine: Whatcha readin'?

Holden: Catcher in the Rye... I'm named after it.

Justine: What's your name? [Holden stares at her blankly] Catcher?

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Corny: You got any interest in reading the Bible?

Justine: I have my own, you know, beliefs.

Corny: Well, we don't preach fire and brimstone. 10 Commandments, gotta live by those. Other than the usual ways, we're not interested in scaring people. We're about loving Jesus.

Justine: Mm-hmm. Yeah, I kind of like my nights to myself.

Corny: Well, maybe you'll have night after night of eternal hellfire all to yourself. Just kidding you. Drive safe. Bye-bye.

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Cheryl: You didn't bring this into the store with you?

Heavy Set Woman: No.

Cheryl: Then I'll go ahead and charge you for it. This is a hand lotion, so don't put it on any other part of your body, even if that part needs lubrication. We try to keep frivolous lawsuits to a minimum, unless, of course, the customer is at fault.

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Old Woman: I look too white, don't you think? Cheryl: Not at all. I'm just trying to match your face with your hair. I was thinking you're not white enough.

Old Woman: I think I look kind of weird.

Cheryl: The first rule of fashion is you have to look weird. What I'm doing has come straight here from France. Old Woman: Oh?

Cheryl: It's called Cirque du Face, meaning "Circus of the Face", and it's all the rage with the Frenchies, ma'am.

Old Woman: Well, you're the professional.

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Justine: They call you Tom?

Holden: It's my slave name.

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Justine: How it all came down to this, only the Devil knows. Retail Rodeo is at the corner on my left. The motel is down the road to my right. I close my eyes and try to peer into the future. On my left, I saw days upon days of lipstick and ticking clocks, dirty looks and quiet whisperings. And burning secrets that just won't ever die away. And on my right, what could I picture? The blue sky, the desert earth, stretching out into the eerie infinity. A beautiful never-ending nothing.

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Jack Field, Your Store Manager: Holden was a thief and a disturbed young man and what happened was a sad thing. Perhaps we can learn a lesson from this tragedy like don't steal and don't be disturbed.

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Corny: It's a church. You can't make water without bumping your nut on a bible.

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Gwen Jackson: Happy Halloween, Corny!

Corny: Oh... I'm not a pagan, but thanks all the same.

Justine: Gwen says smoking marijuana lowers your sperm.

Phil Last: Lowers it to where?

Justine: Maybe you're the infertile one around here. Maybe every time you smoke a little doobie, you're killing our unborn children.

Holden: You're a hooker, you hooker.

Justine: Holden - calm down! Alright?

Holden: I can't calm down! Easy if I was a hooker like you then I'd calm down all over town! 

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Holden: I'm starting to think... That you don't get me.

Justine: MAYBE I *don't* get you.

Holden: YOU DO. YOU DO GET ME, YOU JUST DON'T WANNA GET ME BECAUSE I AM TOO INTENSIFIED FOR YOU.

Cheryl: It's extract of the ginkgo, and it makes your skin real slick so that any liquid will roll right off you, be it water, or lemon juice, or urine. I'll put it in a bag for you.

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Cheryl: Attention, shoppers. There's a Retail Rodeo special on aisle 3. Liquid Drain Cleaner, 2 12-ounce cans for $5.00. Liquid Drain Cleaner has churning power and it will churn right through your pipes. Ladies, you need female plumbing. Shove something clean and new up your filthy pipes. That's Liquid Drain Cleaner on aisle 3. Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Retail Rodeo.

Justine: After living in the dark for so long, a glimpse of the light can make you giddy. Strange thoughts come into your head and you better think'em. Has a special fate been calling you and you not listening? Is there a secret message right in front of you and you're not reading it? Is this your last, best chance? Are you gonna take it? Or are you going to the grave with unlived lives in your veins?

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Justine: As a girl you see the world as a giant candy store filled with sweet candy and such. But one day you look around and you see a prison and you're on death row. You wanna run or scream or cry but something's locking you up. Are the other folks cows chewing cud until the hour comes when their heads roll? Or are they just keeping quiet like you, planning their escape.